Cursed/Doomed/Prisoned by my uncontrollable emotions!!

I don't know what to do ... I just know I can't take it anymore. I don't have the emotional toughness to do it. I don't have the experience to do it. I don't have the drive. I hate crying and have the whole world see my weakness and know how the fucking emotional I am. It is not as simple as ignoring it and that's it. If it was really that simple, u will never see me shed a tear.

I just know I am sad and I want this pain to end, the tears to stop. I don't care anymore ....... pls make it stop.